Whether you’re new to sex toys or just want a refresher on one of the simplest yet most satisfying toys out there, our guide on how to use a dildo is sure to have some handy hints and tips for you. Dildo masturbation is a great way to understand your own body better. This allows you to communicate your own desires better with a partner- and get better orgasms whether you’re alone or not! Women using dildos can do it alone for self-exploration or with a partner for an added dimension to sex. Let’s explore the basics of dildo play, from getting started to how to achieve a mind-blowing “dildo orgasm.” Excited yet? Read on!
Dildo vs. Vibrator
What is a dildo? A dildo is a sex toy that replicates the size, shape, and sometimes the feel of an erect penis. You can use a dildo for masturbation or insertion into a sexual partner. Dildos may have been around for 30,000 years. The very first dildos were made of ivory, bone, bronze, wood (some still are today), tar, and even -and this is weird- bread! Any gender can use a dildo, although our article focuses on using a dildo for vaginal masturbation. Dildos can also be enjoyed by those of any sexual orientation. A vibrator is also a sex toy, often penis-shaped, although not always. A vibrator uses electricity, either from an electrical cord or batteries. It produces vibrations of varying strength designed to stimulate both the vagina and the clitoris with the aim of producing an orgasm. Finger vibrators, vibrating cock rings, and novelty shaped vibrators are all popular. Dildos are much simpler. They focus on manual stimulation of the vagina or anus with the goal of achieving orgasm, often in combination with clitoral stimulation.
Choosing the Right Dildo
This can feel like a catch 22. If you’ve never used a dildo before, how do you know what’s going to feel good? Experimentation is helpful, but of course, you don’t want to spend $100 on sex toys only to find that none of them really, well, hit the spot.
Size Isn’t Everything With Dildo Play
Well, it kind of is. What we mean by this is, don’t go for the biggest, fattest dildo just because you have wild fantasies of being taken by someone hung like the proverbial horse. If you’re new to dildos, start small. A good gauge is to think about how many fingers you can comfortably insert into yourself. If the dildo you are considering is much wider than this, you could find it uncomfortable or even painful. A smaller dildo also gives you the flexibility to change position more easily, making it easier to stimulate sensitive spots.
Check Out the Texture
Some dildos are entirely smooth. These may be made of body-safe silicone, metal, or even glass. Others have different textures to make them appear more “real.” These tend to have patterns emulating the veins on a real penis, and can often have a slightly rough texture. Still, others have ridges or lumps designed to stimulate sensitive areas within the vagina. Many are designed to stimulate the G-spot, although it’s important to remember that not every woman has a G-spot. Even those who do have an extremely sensitive spot, don’t always have it in exactly the same place. Choosing the right texture is a very personal decision. You could base it on previous experiences with vaginal sex. Have you enjoyed ribbed or studded condoms in the past? Have you experimented with other toys? Reading reviews can also give you an idea as to what the toy will feel like once inserted.
Before You Begin Your Dildo Masturbation
Once you’ve chosen the right dildo, just thrusting it up there isn’t necessarily going to have the desired effect- unless you’re really excited already! Just like sex with a partner, masturbation is always better with a bit of preparation.
Get the Mood Right
Lying in a brightly lit room with cable TV blaring in the background isn’t likely to make you feel sexy. Close the blinds, put some favorite music on, maybe even light some incense or a scented candle. Some scents like sandalwood, cinnamon, citrus oils, and jasmine may evoke feelings of lust and arousal. Make your room sultry and seductive- just because you’re on your own doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy a full and sensual masturbatory experience.
Make Sure You Won’t Get Disturbed…
…Unless you want to be, that is! The interrupted masturbation session is a top role-play fantasy for many couples. However, if you’re flying solo, there’s nothing more like a cold shower than the fear of interruption. If you live in shared accommodation, get a lock on your door. If you have kids, do it while they’re at school or out of the house.
Keep the Lube Handy
Lube and vaginas go together like pumpkin pie and cream. Don’t ever fall into the trap of believing that just because you’re not super wet, your vagina isn’t doing what it’s supposed to. Vaginas can feel dryer than usual for many reasons including but not limited to: · Hormones caused by pregnancy · Hormones during breastfeeding · Menopause · Some medical treatments · Using strong or perfumed soaps in the genital area · Stress or fatigue None of these should prevent you from having sex or masturbating if that’s what you want to do. Your body— your rules. Lube is there to help out when you’re horny as hell, but for whatever reason, just not as wet as you’d like. Sex toys don’t produce any moisture themselves, so we recommend you always use lube, regardless of how wet you already feel. With practice, you’ll get to know exactly how much or how little lube you need. But for your first time, use plenty and if insertion is tricky or the size is bigger than you expected, just add a little more and be gentle with yourself.
Dildo Masturbation: The Basics
So, you’re in the mood, you won’t be disturbed, and you’ve got plenty of lube to hand. What’s next?
Warming Up
Just like sex with a partner, masturbation is easier with a bit of foreplay. What gets you in the mood to play? Here are some things women enjoy before dildo play: · Stroking breasts · Tugging, tweaking or even pinching nipples · Rubbing, tapping and teasing the clitoris · Using the end of the dildo to stimulate the clitoris
Inserting the Dildo
Wow, that sounds so clinical, right? But this is actually where the real fun starts. 1. Make sure the dildo has plenty of lube, around both the head and the shaft. 2. Ensure you have plenty of lube around the entrance to your vagina and moving inside, use your fingers to check how well-lubed up you are. 3. You can also use your fingers to open yourself up and ensure your vagina is relaxed and ready to play. 4. Gently insert the head of the dildo into the vagina and ensure there is no pain or discomfort. If there is, remove the head, add more lube to both you and it, and try again. You can also try adjusting the angle of the toy, or sitting or lying in a different position. Sometimes sitting on the edge of the bed or laying down with a pillow underneath your butt can be helpful.
Dildo Masturbation Techniques
Slow and Gentle
Many first-timers may want to go slow and gentle while they get used to the sensation of having a dildo inside them. Long, slow thrusts can also be a warm-up method leading to something a bit more invigorating.
Short and Shallow
Tease yourself with short and shallow thrusts, as fast or as slow as you like. Insert the dildo only a short way into the vagina then pull it nearly all the way out, then back in again.
Fast and Furious
If you like to fantasize about being taken hard and fast, this is the dildo technique for you. Fast, vigorous thrusts will stimulate any sensitive spots inside the vagina. Plus, the overall motion will indirectly stimulate the clitoris, leading to some awesome orgasms.
Angle It Up, or Down
Pushing the base of the dildo down slightly so that the head is angled upwards could stimulate the G-Spot. Doing the reverse, pulling the base up towards you, so the head points downwards, could help increase the sensations on or around your clitoris. You know your body best; experiment and find out what works for you.
Notes on Mobility
Not everyone has the same level of dexterity or mobility. If you have problems with your wrists, arms, or shoulders, holding a dildo for any length of time could become uncomfortable. Dildos that attach to a smooth surface with a suction cup or other method can help with this. Also, a longer dildo could help with other dexterity issues or a lack of flexibility. A longer dildo means more to hold onto, and less bending or twisting to get into that perfect position. Reading reviews and talking to a sex toy expert can help you understand which dildo might be the best fit for you.
Dildo Dos and Don’ts
· Do always clean your toys. Every time. Bacteria is not sexy, and neither is an accidental infection. · Do check that any dildo you buy is body-safe and non-toxic. · That goes for the lube, as well. · Don’t experiment with homemade dildos unless you’re a professional dildo designer. Hairbrushes, fruit and vegetables, aerosol cans, and other household objects might look phallic and fun but can lead to irritation, infection, and even serious injury. · Don’t put your dildo in the microwave oven or freezer. Just don’t. · Don’t expect a partner to be wildly into a sex toy just because you are. Everyone has different tastes in the bedroom. Nothing is sexier than mutual consent and respect. Lastly, don’t be afraid to experiment with the possibilities of a dildo. This article has focused on the pleasures of vaginal masturbation, but the dildo has so much more to offer to any gender: · Strap on dildos allow for fantasy roleplay, pegging, and additional options for lesbian couples as well as many other exciting possibilities. · Dildo anal play can be intensely arousing for both men and women. · Dildos with suction cups allow you to position the dildo on the wall or floor for even more possibilities. · Using a dildo with a partner opens up (pun intended) the possibility of double penetration, which can lead to some truly intense orgasms. The only final point is to say that if you buy a dildo (or any sex toy) with a manual or instructions, give them a quick read. And don’t forget that all-important lube! Life is too short for bad sex- or masturbation. Enjoy! Takeaway: A dildo is a sex toy designed to replicate an erect penis. It can be used in the vagina or anus, for solo masturbation or with a partner. Dildos come in a variety of sizes, shapes, and materials, so most people can buy a dildo that will be perfect for their own personal pleasure and preference.
