Figuring Out How to Moan During Sex

Figuring Out How to Moan During Sex

Moaning during sex can be a very natural occurrence for some people. For others, it may feel awkward and unnatural. There are actually reasons why you moan during sex, and yes – it affects the sex you’re having. Read on to find out what moaning during sex means, why some people do it, and why others just don’t!

Why Do Men and Women Moan During Sex?

Why Do Men and Women Moan During Sex

Making sex sounds is something that often just occurs naturally. Sex noises can often improve sex, too. Why? Because sex noises are a signal to your partner that you are enjoying the sex. When your partner feels as though they are pleasing you, it can turn them on even more.

And this is true for both men and women. Moaning during sex also lets your partner know how much closer you are to achieving your orgasm – which is yet another turn on. Moaning can also let your partner know whether or not to continue what they’re doing. For example, if you’re moaning, it’s safe to say your partner should continue. Complete silence may suggest to your partner that it’s time to try something new. 

Are Sex Moans Considered Healthy?

While sounds of pleasure are perfectly natural and normal, it doesn’t mean you are abnormal if you do not moan during sex. The only thing we know for sure is that moaning during sex is really only helpful when it is genuine.

If you don’t feel comfortable moaning or making sexual noises, you’re not alone. Millions of Americans just feel out of place making noises. If it works for you and your partner, it is perfectly fine. However, if it is affecting your sex life, you and your partner need to discuss it and reach a compromise that makes sex work for you both.

Why Do Women Moan During Sex?

More often than not, women moan during sex for two main reasons: to make sure their partner gets the picture when it comes to what they like and what they don’t like and to satisfy the male ego and turn him on. Women are slightly more intuitive in this department and may make sex noises solely for the benefit of their partner and for spicing up the sexual process. In the end, this can also work to a woman’s advantage.

Why Do Men Moan During Sex?

Men may moan slightly less than women, but when they do moan, it is for one good reason – they are enjoying it. Women have been known to “fake it” to please the male ego, but the reverse simply isn’t true. A man’s moaning during sex is solely a reflection of how much he is enjoying it and how hard he is trying to satisfy his woman.

Why Do Some People Not Moan During Sex?

There are a few reasons why some people do not moan during sex. For some people, it just doesn’t feel natural. The only way to do it would be to fake it, and this doesn’t feel right for you or your partner either. Again, this isn’t a bad thing.

With men, a lack of moaning may also be because men see moaning as effeminate and don’t want to diminish their masculinity during a sexual encounter. For women, moaning may just feel a little too much like a porn flick and turn her off completely.

Myths and Facts About Moaning During Sex

To make it clear, here are a few myths and facts about moaning during sex.


  • Only women moan during sex.
  • Moaning is a sign of orgasm.
  • Moaning is a turn on for women.
  • Moaning during sex is expected.
  • Fake moaning or screaming during sex is just as effective.


  • Men and women both moan during sex.
  • Moaning is not only when someone orgasms but as they build up to it. (The work isn’t done quite yet!)
  • Moaning is a turn on for men, specifically.
  • Quiet sex can be just as pleasurable for both partners.
  • Moaning during sex is only effective when it is real (your partner shouldn’t feel they are on the right track if they aren’t, and picking up on your false moaning could be a real damper on the party).

Is Male Moaning Effeminate?

Absolutely, not! Nothing about moaning during sex is reserved for one gender over the other. Moaning is simply an expression of one’s satisfaction with the sexual encounter. Both men and women moan during sex, even if they do so differently.

What Do I Do if I Just Can’t Moan During Sex?

If moaning really feels unnatural to you and you don’t feel comfortable with it, you need to have an open and honest conversation with your partner. They need to be very honest about whether or not this bothers them. If they conceal dissatisfaction, it will only grow and eventually cause deep problems in your sex life.

You need to speak honestly about what is working and what isn’t. Maybe you can find out why moaning isn’t your thing together. Maybe your partner needs to work on some areas that may please them more. Or perhaps this is just who you are.

If you can’t seem to deal with this issue together, consider seeking the help of a sex therapist. A certified sex therapist can help you work through your problems as a couple and help you both find a way to enjoy sex together even more – with or without moaning!

The Bottom Line

A sexual encounter should be enjoyable for both parties. If you’re moaning to feed your partner’s ego but aren’t really satisfied, the problem won’t just resolve itself. It’ll get worse, and eventually, sex together may seem very unappealing to you. The only way to truly improve your sex life is to be open and honest about what you like and don’t like.

Remember not to place expectations on the other person. This can diminish their sexual capacity and make it more difficult to enjoy sex with you. Sex has to be enjoyable for you both, and that can only be achieved if you are both listening to each other.

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